I’m Nervous

Things have been hectic around here.

I mean, when aren’t they? But things have been especially hectic lately.

That? Would be the truck M bought last Friday. [Say ‘Hi!’ to Chef Nate, everyone.]

Part of me feels like I want to puke, because honestly? This is happening a lot faster than I thought it would. Logically, I know my husband is basically miserable in his restaurant job. I know he loves restaurants, but hates the hours. I know he’s doing this for us, because he wants to provide an amazing future. I just wish I weren’t so damn nervous about the whole thing.

And yes, I get it. Let go & let God. I have faith that this will all work out. I’m just a wreck.

It’s okay. It will be great.

Presenting: Wildwich. Go, read the menu. It’s great food. Follow them on twitter & on Facebook. And look for the truck in Wilmington this summer. You won’t regret it.


I just want you to know, I did not sign up for this.

I did not sign up for a five year old who loves school so much he barely gave me a hug on his first day. I did not sign up for a kid who loves riding the bus more than having his Mommy drive him to school & gets disappointed when the latter happens. I didn’t sign up for a kid who is as bright as this one is. I didn’t sign up for eye rolls & exasperation & the ‘duh, mom!’ tone of voice. I didn’t sign up for a kid who is nearly as big as me already & sometimes ignores me when I call his name because he’s embarrassed. I certainly didn’t sign up to be a soccer mom.

soccer mom

But I did sign up for hugs & ‘I love you, Mommy!’ & snuggles before bedtime & kisses & ‘You’re so silly!’ I signed up for ‘break me’ hugs & noses & eyes & reading all the books ever. I signed up for a boy who loves to learn more than I ever did. I signed up to raise boys into men with the help of my husband.

I signed up for this because I always knew I wanted to be a mommy.


I definitely signed up for that smile & those eyes & that personality.

On Turning Five

First of all, who told my kid he was allowed to grow up & do big kid stuff like lose a tooth or start Kindergarten? I’d very much like to have that person drawn & quartered.

I posted this on my instagram feed yesterday, so I apologize if you’ve already seen it, but man. This kid.

So this happened in the last five years…

We spent yesterday at the children’s museum. We ended up buying a membership, because the boys had so much fun. His Super Hero Squad birthday party is on Saturday. He’s been asking whether it’s time for it since approximately June. All in all, he had a good birthday.

And he discovered today, THANKS TO HIS GIGI [NO REALLY, THANKS MOM] that he has another loose tooth. I’m willing to bet it will fall out before Kindergarten starts.

Happy Birthday, Kiddo.

You drive me crazy for sure, but you are so. stinking. smart. that it’s all in good fun, I think. You ask a bunch of questions & rarely do I have the answers you think I should, but like I said today, “I forgot. You’re five. You know everything.” You’re super excited about Kindergarten. Even though getting you registered has been a special kind of fiasco, it’s been worth it. I’m really grateful to your pre-school teacher for encouraging us to look in to a gifted program for you. And we could not be more proud of you.

You asked for a special breakfast yesterday. Normally, your Pop & I like to have you guys wake up with just us on the morning of your birthday. This year, you weren’t having it. You asked for four things: blueberry pancakes, bacon, apple juice, & your brother. I think it’s safe to say Bear is your very best friend. You were super excited that Pop put a D & a 5 in your pancakes.

Birthday pancakes for the win!

You love Super Hero Squad & other super hero TV shows. You constantly ask us if we can get cable back now, please, but you don’t pout too much when I tell you that’s not in our plans. You love computer time, you love swimming, and you like to be outside. You played soccer & tee ball this year. I don’t think either one of them was your favorite, but seeing you score your first goal & hit a ball thrown to you by your coach? That was a pretty special thing.

Thanks for making me a Mommy. Thank you for being worth every ache & pain I had while you were growing in my tummy. Thank you for being a bright spot in a bunch of dark things that have happened to our family in the past five years. Thank you for being oblivious to most of them. Thank you for your laugh & your smile & your encouragement. I love when you tell me, “You can do it, Mommy!” I don’t love it so much when you ignore me when I ask you not to use potty words.

Most of all, I love you. Keep growing. Keep learning. Keep loving to read & loving to do science experiments.

Happy Birthday.